Very superstitious?

A wedding is fraught with traditions, lots and lots of traditions. In the course of skimming the net for wedding whatnots, I stumbled across a handful of websites detailing the traditions and customs of this lifelong institution.

Anyway, it all really starts with the proposal doesn't it? A long long time ago suitors would send a pair of gloves to their intended as a proposal. If she wore the gloves to church the following Sunday it signified acceptance of his proposal. The Welsh were even more offbeat - the suitor would carve a spoon and present it to his beloved who, if she accepted his proposal, wear the spoon around her neck on a ribbon! Not quite the bling we're used to. Ladies rejoice! 2008 is nigh! It is considered acceptable for the female half to propose on 29 February in a leap year...something to do with the 29th not being a "real" day therefore, traditions held no weight on that day.

Engagement, or betrothal rings used to be considered partial payment for the bride and al pledge of the groom's intentions hence the reference to an engagement as a contract for marriage. I believe modern etiquitte dictates that should the engagement be broken by the male half, the female half gets to keep the ring, however, if she ends the engagement she must return the ring not unlike our modern concept of sale & purchase contracts - if the buyer terminates the contract, the vendor gets to keep the deposit and vice versa. Yes, it would seem us women are chattels to be traded at the whims and fancies of the male species. Did you know that women have sued over broken engagements?

Engagement rings weren't always the diamond that we're all so familiar with these days. Until the 15th century, only kings wore diamonds and gems were reserved for the upper echleons of society...all this to maintain a clear division between social classes. As the years went by, the diamond emerged as the symbol of betrothal because its clarity and brilliance reflected innocence and purity, while it's strength signaled the hope of an enduring love. Thank God for De Beers and it's now legendary "A Diamond is Forever" campaign which firmly entrenched the diamond and THE engagement rock in our minds forever and ever Amen. All wedding and engagement rings are worn on the third finger of the left hand. The vein in this finger was once believed to go directly to the heart which is closely associated with love.

Your engagement ring signifies that you are pledged to a lucky so and so. For the material girl in all of us, that bit of bling shouts (or whispers, as the case may be) of your man's commitment to you or in some cases it can be an indication that he should be committed...to a mental institution...but that's another post altogether :p

Choosing a wedding day isn't made any easier if you want to stick to tradition.

"Monday for wealth
Tuesday for health
Wednesday the best day of all
Thursday for losses
Friday for crosses
Saturday for no luck at all"

Next you have to pick a month...

"Married when the year is new, he'll be loving, kind and true.
When February birds do mate, You wed nor dread your fate.
If you wed when March winds blow, joy and sorrow both you'll know.
Marry in April when you can, Joy for Maiden and for Man.
Marry in the month of May, and you'll surely rue the day.
Marry when June roses grow, over land and sea you'll go.
Those who in July do wed, must labour for their daily bred.
Whoever wed in August be, many a change is sure to see
Marry in September's shrine, your living will be rich and fine.
If in October you do marry, love will come but riches tarry.
If you wed in bleak November, only joys will come, remember.
When December snows fall fast, marry and true love will last."

A longer wordier dictator-like rhyme is available here.

Then the colour of your wedding dress...

"Married in white, you have chosen right.
Married in blue, your lover is true.
Married in pink, your fortunes will sink.
Married in green, you will not long be seen.
Married in red, you'll wish you were dead.
Married in yellow, ashamed of the fellow.
Married in brown, you'll live out of town.
Married in grey, you'll live far away.
Married in black, you'll wish you were back."

Is there no end to these wretched rhymes!?!

The commonly repeated "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue" is familiar to every bride. This dates back to Victorian times when the the full version was "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue and a silver sixpence in her shoe"... now where can I get a silver sixpence for my shoe? and what on earth does it mean?

• "Something old" represents the link with the bride's family and the past.
• "Something new" represents the good fortune and success in her future.
• "Something borrowed" reminds her that friends and family will be there for her when she needs help.
• "Something blue" symbolises faithfulness and loyalty.
  

My favourite superstition is associated with dominance and shopping. It is said that the first partner to purchase something new after the wedding will be the dominant one in the relationship. The perfect excuse to go shopping! Maybe stop at a kedai runcit between church and home??

These traditions are just the tip of the iceberg. I haven't even delved into the Chinese wedding superstitions and pantangs (taboos) yet! Google "wedding traditions & superstitions" and you get this. It would be crippling to have to organise your wedding around all these traditions!

On a more personal note, it's 12 weeks to the day and all is well. Parents are polishing off guest lists, flowers & pretty bits and other scary logistic things are all in capable (read: parental) hands and it looks like I'm on track with my dress although I do have a little itty bitty shoe dilemma.

We went wedding band hunting yesterday - B has FAT fingers! I can't believe that nowhere in this country sells plain wedding bands!! Everything has fancy swirls and whatnot on it. You have to custom order plain bands...oh the irony of it *sigh* To engrave or not to engrave, that is the question. Decisions...decisions...decisions...the list goes on...and on...and on...and on...